IT- DON’T DO IT!! There is so much debate on whether or not one should meet a guy online. Its become the new big thing since blind dates but my question to you is: Do you want to be caught up in a relationship with a guy who might be half way across the world to only dream about the days you could be together ending up lonely and sad when you are not talking to the person and fighting about little things when you are?? Yeah, didn’t think so.
It’s a very curious concept, believe me, and I was very enraged and fascinated that I could be attracted to a guy and he could be attracted to me while we lived in two different worlds (what seemed like it) and for a long time I kept kidding myself saying “no worries, one day we will meet AND no worries, we will make something happen for the sake of us” but they were all lies I was telling myself. Who was I kidding, I liked the little conversations that we had and the times when he would ask how I was just knowing that someone cared. I just really liked him.
But as the months went on, and I grew less and less patient, I questioned why I really liked him and the “So” question….The question in the relationship that determines whether or not you become something or if you stop talking to one another (yes I got that from That Awkward Moment) . I mean, don’t get me wrong, he was very cute to me and because he thought I was perdy, I was very happy. But what else? I felt like he stopped caring about me and that I was always bothering him. He never really gave me much of his time and I was the one always messaging him. We had stopped talking as much as we used to and it was getting to the point where we sexting was the only time we ever really did. But I still liked him and still did not know why.
It was after one night that realized (brought myself to really think about it and stopped suppressing the thoughts) I only liked him as much as I did because he was the only guy I was talking to. I made myself emotionally unavailable to the point where I almost started to cry on many different occasions….but for what?
Slowly but surely, we slowed down in terms of talking. I try not to think of him but I can’t help but think, what could have happened. I mean I still wonder what could have happened but I’m not putting 100% in a relationship where I’m only getting back five and that’s what keeps me from thinking about him.
*Sigh* Looking back at it now, I don’t regret any decision I made toward the time and effort I put into…. it(I wouldn’t even call it a relationship). It was a fun and crazy time in my life where I got the boost of confidence I needed to be a little bit more experienced in the guy department but I would not wish it upon my worst enemy. It’s a big headache, heartache and emotionally draining. Meeting someone the old fashion way is honestly the best thing you could do for yourself. And for all those who are in a relationship via the world wide web, congrats to you! You did something I just could not. If this has happened to you, be sure to message me with any ideas, questions or whatever you feel like saying! I am somewhat of a internet junkie and so I will try and reply quickly but other than that, I will write soon so, Till Next Time!!
Keeping Things Peppermint